Have you finally orgasmed yet?
New discovery: doing the Helen Keller is not as attractive as I thought it would be, in reference to the sex noises.
He said he had to make up a lie of why he couldnt sleep with her. It must really suck to have a sunburned dick.
He said something pertaining to Ragu and vodka I'm worried
I'm making presurgery martini's. You need to be here.
Also, I don't remember opening my gifts from my family. It was cool when I woke up with a new ihome.
I sat on the ground outside wawa chain smoking and telling two strangers about my sex life. I also accepted Rick James Bitch and Celine Dion as their names.
Let's just say that the best way to get a girls attention is not to slap her on the ass from the window of a moving cab.
Yea no bueno and I only brought enough weed to last one night. And it was no Hanukah nug, it didn't last 8 days.
Dude. I've never been with a guy who just wanted to go down on me all the time including while I'm shooting zombies on call of duty. My life is complete.
you were caressing the jar of pickles then you looked down and whispered to them "I want you inside me"
I jammed my finger giving him a hand job. Don't ask how, I'm still trying to figure that out.
You want to know how I feel? I feel like Cady Heron pushed me in front of a bus last night.
its not even a love triangle. its a love square and it has come back to haunt me
You better have a raging boner when I get to your house and it better be worth missing work in the morning.
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