found an unmarked box of photos in the garage, they were from when my parents first got together. It was fun laughing at their ridiculous eighties outfits and hairstyles, until I found a pic of my dad. naked. with a boner.
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
I haven't been "cry when you eat ben and jerrys" high in a while.
Pretty certain he passed out for a while going down on me. Absolutely certain he passed out during the blow job.
Hahhaha I literally just rolled outta bed and went to get beer in my pj's and slippers. God I love graduating
She told me she's going to buy a projector so she can watch porn on her ceiling...I'm telling you man this chick is going places
Not much, really baked..... beethoven is AMAZING it's like i'm flying in space with baby jesus
Roommate is eating a chimichanga, watching Dr Doolittle 2 and weeping. His Tuesday hangovers make me feel better about my life.
The police report said that there were 25 cases of bud light, two hookers fighting in the street, 13 cop cars, and two road blocks, a kid got tazered, another got maced, and over a hundred people in the house
So that means its a bad thing that your dad found it huh?
Sometimes while peeing I'll go hands free, put my arms up by my chest and make claw hands, and pretend I'm a new type of dinosaur called Dickosaurus Rex.
Is the party worth it?
I am drink. Beer pony and singing.
hell no. i was not wasting my two tears of virginity on him.
Will you skip merrily into hell with me?
Update: my mom just told someone to shut up and suck her dick
it's like i'm your dad, but instead of reminding you to bring your lunch to school i remind you to take a good long hit from your bong.
Randomize
