dude, i was at the student union last night trying to study but some retarded sorority spent an hour voting on the color of the seasons shirts like it was a UN meeting- someone motioned purple, someone objected, and half an hour later after 2 recounts they decided on purple
Evidently I told a girl she should leave the bar because no one wanted to fuck her.
i just shaved my vag. i figure it gave me about ten more minutes to drink tomorrow.
Having a vagina does not stop me from believeing my balls are bigger than yours.
It's a delicate game of how much porn can I look at without the other interns noticing.
I will be going to walgreens soon.. nothing says trainwreck like pickin up a scrip for xanax at 2am drunk..
He's a prodigy! It would be a service to the scientific community.
15 is 15
Blood work from physical was all good, apparently heavy alcohol use agrees with me
So you'd go straight for a fat chick with cheese on her tits?
Yes.
Welcome to Missouri, the show me your genitals state.
Bruh, I wanna absorb into the deck.
I wanna become a plank.
God I love xanex.
It's become almost a Pavlovian response. The sound of the vacuum being run by hubby causes an instantaneous involuntary orgasm.
Once you find out someone has a small dick, you never look at them the same again.
Upon further investigation my nipples are bruised and I have teeth marks all over.
why is half of my head shaved?
Randomize
