tweet Hawks Win!! tweet
That's how twitter works, right?
So A**** bought my story about how my hickey was a bruise from wrestling
on one hand i'm glad that i'm not in trouble...on the other hand i realized that the reason i cheat on her is because she is so stupid
My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
She sat on the stairs and yelled sex positions at us. I don't remember if we went along with it but judging by the beer and condoms I'm thinking yes.
I just remembered you had me meet your law professor while I was wasted...how'd that go?
Mike is so stoned. I just heard him quietly mutter to himself "rock a piss" as he walked down the hall to the bathroom
Last thing I remember is beer bonging sangria. Dear God.
Recycling my beer bottles from breakfast counts for earth day, right?
A guy with the name Pootie Tang winked st me and a guy that doesn't speak English messaged me. These are my choices?
Was she always missing a tooth or am I just now noticing it?
I don't question myself. That's what I have you for.
I'm honored.
The first thing I did in 2015 was suck a dick.....so.....
I had to say goodbye to one of my fuck buddies last night. He's voting for Trump, we shouldn't be doing it anyways.
Typically a man doesn't buy a woman a drink in hopes of her laughing at his penis, but no one said I was normal.
You know, normal sex stuff involves shitting your pants. If you do it right.
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