TYLER... glimpse of last night: leather chaps, guacamole dip, a jump rope, spray paint, and rhinestone studded pajamas.
i think you have the wrong number... but your story sounds delightful.
walk of shame with early morning football tailgaters. niice.
all her text said was "asdfhdaufhudshfuds" and i knew that meant come over
We asked an illegal alien to buy us beer. He didn't even want a tip. I'm going to Washington to plead that case.
he seriously made his penis a facebook.
In all seriousness...vodka, almond milk and chocolate syrup make a decent white russian.
You know it was a good weekend when; you leave a bi-lingual letter of apology on top of a stack of cash for hotel housekeeping.
Woke up w/ the same freshman as last Saturday but we were sober this time. Is that a relationship?
I like to balance the number of cups of coffee to bong rips in the morning before work.
He sent me a picture of his dick saying "your throne my lady" for my birthday. He knows the way to my heart.
Our first kiss happened while shot gunning a hit from a gravity bong. Its that type of relationship.
I'm eating taquitos in the bathtub at 5:30 am. What a great end to the night
We drank vodka and koolaid through a traffic cone. It got rowdy.
yea so the plan to relive our college glory days was great and all but ending up in the er with alcohol poisoning was crossing the line
he literally walked in took a shit and left ringing the 'great service' bell on the way out.
Randomize
