Dude..TWLOHA day. gonna write LOVE on my arms before going to the bar tonight. its like a pussy guarantee.
Can you still call it a wet dream if sandwiches were involved?
It's sad that the best source of heat that I have is my vaporizer.
the caf people were giving us weird looks and she yelled ITS A LIFE STYLE
Next time we're there I want drunk pics of us trying to ride the stone lions downtown. Don't even attempt to fight me on this.
i'm sick of coming in second next to bourbon.
Its official. I've reentered slutty territory. I was a condom away from having sex in a childs playhouse at a park. Oh and I lost my car keys.
He came to my house drunk at two a.m., got in the hot tub, refused to get out until he smoked a blunt, and said "That's what brothers and sisters are for."
Bro I am trying to have one night stands nothing more, unless she is baking waffles I can eat out of her butthole I am not interested
I think I may have walked up to her while she was with her friends and asked for a "do over".
we had break-up sex in a port-a-potty. how do you think it went?!
NEW HOUSE RULE! If you make it in a chicks cleavage it's 3 cups and bra off.
BP at your house from now on.
this is a preemptive text before you call me freaking out: i have your keys and your car is parked safely a block down from your apartment.
you are a goddess
I'm watching the World Cup in bed naked with john and our USA flag aviator glasses. Can you say America?
He pretended his dick was a samurai sword and that he was slaying me with it is it bad I still wanted him to fuck me
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