like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
We videoed ourselves having sex... I now know why I close my eyes during sex
Hey I have to teach you how to run in heels before vegas
Have you ever made a sandwich from swedish fish and tortilla chips?
I found the other part of your tooth if you want to put it under your pillow
I am literally sitting on the toilet in utter disbelieve that last night even happened. My god that was only Monday.
This was my thought process as I drunkenly ran home: Whoa! I'm going so FAST! Why don't I run EVERYWHERE! ALL THE TIME! Then I peed in a bush and passed out on the ground.
So basically you were a dog.
Halfway through he got an idea for a short story so he wrote it in magic marker on my boobs. Yeah, he's a keeper.
Why do you have an empty bottle of port in your bathroom bin?
If tits could talk, mine would be bragging
When did it become normal to wake up in the middle of the night to take a group bathroom break and have a 10 minute discussion on where the next football game is?
so much tequila, so little girl.
If catching your vomit in my hands while swimming in a bath tub full of it doesn't make us best friends, I don't know what will
My drug dealer just told me goodnight...I still don't know his name. But I guess you can say we've moved to the next step.
Idk if I want to put a bra on
Randomize