Sweetheart, you've always been a horrid bitch...
i have a "get your shit together" dinner with my parents tonight. After that ill be down to party
Karaoke into a bottle of boones. dear summer in alabama, glad to see you again.
Just opened a bottle with my rape whistle. At least it's finally getting used for something.
We should have cut you off when you asked the can driver if you could ride in the trunk.
I'm still finding big obvious chunks of condom around my car.
If by "in control" you mean him showing-up to work wasted, calling a customer a "fuckstick," and getting fired on the spot? Then yes, he is.
One huge ass giant mistake followed by celebatory shots and coors lights thats my day in a nut shell
Pretty sure I'm going to hell because of our friendship
Last one there wins
She seems less like a roommate, and more like a homeless person who snuck into your apartment.
what's your room number? I've never been there sober...
HOCKEY BUTTS AND BASEBALL BUTTS HONESTLY DO SOMETHING TO ME
Not sure but if it exists I will find it and I will fill my face with it
ever feel bored AND lazy?
I call it "awake" but yeah...
I pointed at him and said “there goes mr fuckwad”
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