I just want dick. Yours just gets priority because it is glorious
If i need to get strippers involved i will.
Fastest blow job ever. Though it was probably a good thing since we were in front of my house.
just used clorox wipes to give myself a whores bath. hello finals week
i put his shirt in a ziplock bag to preserve his smell
please tell me you are kidding me
I still love him regardless of his misguided forays into heterosexuality
Just had the moment before I realised I'd packed you off in an ambulance last night after funnel-feeding you Monster and vodka. Your mom thinks I'm a dick doesn't she?
5am update: in a toga seeing triple made out with both sexes
Hey..um, you dont know me, but I just found your purse in a bush at the end of my street this morning
I said geronimo as I came I'm not sure if he appreciated the doctor who reference or was just confused
There is a guy here calling himself the pants less weed fairy
You're about wine.
Yes, I'm like 90% wine at the moment
Is 36 too old to fuck a college student? THIS IS BOTH IMPORTANT AND TIME SENSITIVE
I discovered moonshine and fell in love.
I'm going to need you to stop harassing my professor on Twitter when you're drunk.
Randomize
