If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
i walked into the party and i guess everyone knew because they began to chant "ass to mouth"
I woke up naked in my own vomit. Not even in my bed. No one is happy.
I feel so grown up. I just went to home depot to buy actual home improvement supplies instead of stuff to make a bong with.
I don't even care that his girlfriend will be there. Us hooking up is a tradition and she will NOT ruin it.
Just spent the equivalent of my life savings in the liquor store. This is going to be a good weekend
He ended our Skype call with, "I'm going to poop and then go play my ukulele in the park."
Oh and I'm kind of in the library.
Waiting for the foreign guy who keeps staring to make his creepy move.
Ive only just recently decided that NOT fucking you would be best for both of us.
If a raisin and a desert had a bastard child that would be the inside of my mouth right now
I finally got the glitter off in time to get to the party and bang the bday boy in the bathroom while his girlfriend was lighting the bday cake candles.
I need an inhaler full of pot for all of this breathless rage.
Just used my eyelash curler to open a bottle of cider...
Idk how much of a virgin he is but I'm tryna find out.
You chased a rabbit then knocked on a police car and asked the cop "if he saw where that little bastard went."
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