so now that im really awake i see that my underwear are completely ripped down the side, my shorts are on backwards, i have to go get plan b....i call last night an epic fail or success depending on how catholic i am feeling
How many 'remember name' entries is it inappropriate to have in one's cell phone?
they would be such cute babies and they would grow up to have huge dicks. and that would make me proud as a mother
Only you could walk of shame to a childrens pirate themed birthday party
In that case, I'll try 2 find a date. But my options are AA friends or fuck buddies.
I think I shall call his penis Gatsby. We talk about it all the time, but I never see it.
Just got cockblocked by my GF's wedding shower... That's a first. And I have to buy a gift.
We fucked so hard that when I orgasmed I tore his towel rack off the wall. He was more impressed than mad.
Please tell me that SOMEONE, SOMEWHERE, has created a drink called a 'Tequila Mockingbird'. PLEASE.
i saw way too much penis for that to have been a funeral
Well at least ssomeone is or the state is tafing over ir in twligiob
I just got high and swiffered the bathroom floor....2 for 2 on brilliant life ideas
We had a quickie at work in the office. He walked out before me, and I fell asleep while waiting a few minutes to walk out. Yeah. He's got that change your life dick
She totals her lexus and all she wants is to have crazy wild sex.
The waxing lady fingered me during my brazilian. 40 dollars well spent
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