Say my name once during sex just to fuck with her. Like when it gets rough.
erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
Facebook really needs to add a bikini picture profile tab for girls, it would really save me countless amounts of time!
I just ate a bag of doritos while taking a shower. I can now officially do anything
I hate that he uses me for something other than sex. What does he think I am? His girlfriend? Ha.
Where is a good place to buy a New Year's outfit that acknowledges I don't have tits but screams I suck dick like a champ?
My liver is crying. And I feel like I got fingered by Edward Scissorhands. While he was wearing brass knuckles
That girl is nothing but trouble. She's 40% red hair and 60% daddy issues.
At least I remembered to wear a bra. I feel like that's a big accomplishment right now
She licked my face when I was on the phone with a customer and I just laughed. Im not sure if thats good or bad
no need to worry, I have the internet and a cape, I can accomplish anything. nothing can go wrong, I am unstoppable. Yo.
I went out to have a smoke, and next thing I know, he's got me bent over a picnic table praying to deities I don't believe in. You should have been there.
Adulthood is making your own puke bucket.
Woke up in a car, do you own a silver car parked a few miles form the house...hope so
We were totally high while having sex, I told him fast or slow, just follow your balls. That was a show stopper.
Randomize