So for his birthday I'm planning on doing what stripper did when she put the matches on her nipples..lights them n makes him blow them out..SEE I AM dating material.
What should i be more turned off about... his massive collection of condoms or that he asked me to sign my name by number 68 on the list posted on his wall?
I think the two go hand in hand.
DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
i just heard her through the wall saying "not on my face! NOT on my face!" then a scream and "I SAID NOT ON MY FACE!!!"...nice work dude.
I am drinking at a movie theater seeing a children's movie, 2nd time this week
i think the beer goggles wore off after hearing the story of her 2nd abortion
This might be the most awkward night of my life. And I had someone pee on me once.
Just saying goodbye until I figure this whole "warrant out for my arrest" thing
Dude, she found the red hair dye from 4th of July. then she proceeded to give you a red mohawk for a more patriotic thanksgiving eve. How do you not remember that?
You'd be amazed at how difficult it is to find pics of the helicopter dick
I am very proud of your internet skills
so the photographer said "let's get a picture of the cousins" so we posed together, and then he said " lets get a picture of the couples" So we posed together.
We were simultaneously boning chicks 3 feet away from each other. Do you realize how much that upped our 15 year friendship?
can i bring anything?
Any of the following: Sex doll, side dish, fruits/vegetables that look like dildos, beer
is there a theme i should know about?
I would definitely ride that dick into the sunset if nuggets are involved
I slept like a rock because of your dick. I'll thank him personally later.
Randomize
