i just found five singles in my underwear?! im suspicious but delighted none the less
All I remember is saying that "fire will make it all better"
Yeah you insisted everyone watch Space Jam at 2 in the morning then you cried the whole way through it. You were the very worst kind of drunk.
You're the only person I know who could blow literal chunks, laugh about it, then proceed to shotgun another beer. Love you champ.
We should drive around in your Jeep on snow days and get stoned while we help random strangers stuck in the snow. So much good karma.
I am very happy to share that the hospital says the testicle pain is normal and that they are going to take care of it.
We had half a pitcher of beer left and he asked us if we wanted a to-go cup. Fuck yeah we want it to-go.
I just got hit with cramps and found a mystery pill. I'm gonna stay put for an hour and at least see what happens.
Update: just imagined being dirty talked to in an Irish brogue and I think my vagina became a sentient being.
And the sexual frustration is like I'm wearing a damn horcrux
Still alive. Just brushed my teeth with fireball.
3 words: harry potter burlesque. My life is so much more awesome than yours right now.
Brother gave me a harry potter philosophy book for xmas we need to get stoned and talk about this.
I just threw up in front of a bunch of parents/prospective students while they were on a campus tour..awesome..
i love how you, my friend, sends me a picture of herself wearing a shirt that says "i am dead inside" and i'm just like "awww baby you're so cute"
that's just solidarity
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