Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
Im in the beachers at wrigley listening to four lesbians debate the pros and cons of 2girls1cup. Success.
dude your girlfriend loves you alot..she yelled your name lastnight in bed
he was wearing a tuxedo, i was naked...it's a long story.
time for a it's-monday-night-and-this-week-is-gunna-suck-drink.
I'm finding that as the end of the quarter approaches, the list of things I refuse to do sober keeps getting longer.
Not many best friends can say they've all made out with a homeless guy
I don't know. I was hiding and the bed was banging. I am going to sleep now in someone's car.
Having to grow a landing strip to cover the bruises from pole dancing. Thanks for the birthday present, but next time, maybe just a gift card?
omg how embarrassing to not hear the delivery person knocking because you're singing "where are you Pizza" to the tune of "where are you christmas" too loudly
A dick pic is not a proper way to say I'm sorry
I'm now at a gay bar with our relatives
I'm soaking her vibrators in tabasco and wasabi paste. "furious" is an understatement
I SHOULD BE TERRIFIED OF HIS DRAGON DICK.
so this hot guy who looks like brad pitt circa troy era in my physics lab is staring at me right now and it's taking all the willpower I have not to procreate with him right now.
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