Just boiled hotdogs in bongwater. NOT a good idea.
after the first, "yea you like that baby", i quickly remembered why i had stopped having sex with him.
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
It is 3am. I'm at a pizzeria with my 4 friends. The one to my right is throwing up on herself, the one to my left is crying hysterically by herself, the one in front of me is passed out on the table, and the other is trying to find a taxi and I'm pretty sure a guy is sticking his hand up her skirt. Tourists are taking pictures. Help me.
Just try to lay there and not be pregnant.
He started making shapes and faces with his cock and balls.... apparently if you wrap the shaft with your balls and turn it 90 degrees to the left it looks like a hamburger
Somehow I gave him blood blisters on his dick...I don't know if I'm that good or that bad.
I just past a guy who was biking and double fisting wit glass beer bottles. That is what i call talent
We both paused during sex to do the clap during the Friends theme song. Soulmates.
I was woken up at 6 am by a second grader trying to give me a sweatshirt for a pillow
My vagina is officially offended.
THIS IS SO HOT. BYE PANTIES.
Newest quarantine problem - I’ve watched all of the porn. Like everything on the the internet, all the DVDs, mags, VR, leisure suit Larry all of it and I’m still horny af
That man makes my giblets tingle
Congrats? I think?
There’s a child, alone, sitting on a picnic table out there, making bird noises
Randomize
