Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
Whats the opposite of morning wood? Whatever its called, everyone saw it when it fell out.
I just saw a guy in the gym riding the bicycle while watching baseball and dipping.
While drunk it seemed like a good idea to barricade my roommate in his room with everything that we could move in our apartment, waking up to him screaming from it collapsing on top of him was just an added bonus.
And then she proceeded to fling her bra around while screaming the rocket power theme song, still managing to not fall off the skateboard
Well he's not exactly single.. It's like an open relationship his wife doesn't know about
went thru the pain of a Brazilian and he's passed the fuck out while i eat Doritos and watch tbs. fuck married life i want out
Just found out they make medicinal lollipops, bought like 40 of them. Gonna go fill a pediatricians lollipop bowl.
I only feel half bad for cheating on him because while we were fucking I was given great relationship advice and now I'm ready to work some things out.
of course we have a beer bong
how else would we feed our christmas tree
We celebrated International Women's Day by spending $700 and taking our tops off at the strip club
The boys offered to pay but we went halfs because we're feminists
We have a little not a lot. We already rolled a blunt and named him Ron.
You drink too much. You cuss too much. You have questionable morals. You're everything I've ever wanted in a friend.
Did you just correct my spelling of a made up word?
No, I just was using your word in plural form
You literally snort drugs up your nose and you’re questioning the brand of the multivitamin right now?
Randomize
