So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
Remind me that when I'm pregnant, I should NOT post vaginal dilation updates on my facebook. Ever.
Freshman orientation day on campus. Dear diary, JACKPOT.
I was so high I couldnt even listen to music i was terrified of the potential knowledge i would gain.
im youtubing treadmill accidents. this is what i do at 2:10am
She's good at three things and two of them involve dicks. And other one involves her love for arts
Do you think that my Facebook profile picture kinda look like im being raped by a 10 foot polar bear ?
I said geronimo as I came I'm not sure if he appreciated the doctor who reference or was just confused
Who had my phone last night? Whoever it was sent "Fuck you, you're adopted" to half the people on my contact list.
You should make a checklist to ensure they are quality material. Here's mine: wearing shoes, not drunk, very hot, has teeth, speaks english. You never know
Okay let's look at your past accomplishments you've done hungover... Sat great score, academic decathlon, state for track. I think you are solid to go out tonight
In local news "Man Stabbed With Golf Club" next person who tells me this is a safe place to live gets punched...
I just opened a pickle jar stoned as fuck. I clapped for myself. I feel like wonder woman.
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
I went to the nurse and she literally told me I was too sexually active and wrote me a prescription for 7 days of pelvic rest...... Hahahhahaha
Randomize
