does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
Planned Parenthood should have gift certificates.
SOME GIRL ON THE STAIRS IN FRONT OF ME JUST FARTED AND IT WENT STRAIGHT INTO MY MOUTH!
Vanilla vodka + chocolate soymilk does NOT equal an epic milkshake.
we're doing shots for every degree below freezing it is outside
i was in the bathroom puking my brains out, a girl walked in and said "i just came to do the same thing" so i told her i would move over and share the toilet. its better than being alone.
If we were to wake in ur bed together, what are the 3 words you would say to me?
Get out now.
At one point in time, he cried and said I didn't appreciate him.
I would like to apologize for my MANY attempts of trying to motor boat you.
I gotta find new tactics tho. There's just so many tied up dicks one can look at before part of your soul dies.
I realized I used a copy of a biography of JFK as pillow last night...
Happy Fourth.
No, supporting your unemployed boyfriend IS NOT what credit cards are for.
OHMYGOD I LITERALLY JUST FINISHED JERKING OFF AND MY MOM BUSTS IN AND HANDS ME A BABY WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON IN MY HOUSE JESUS H CHRIST!
We have a lot of substance abuse to do tomorrow its sleep time
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
Randomize