the only girl from my high schools graduating class coming to our school next year went stag to prom and still has braces...
dibs.
a man that wears gold spandex underwear and party boys other people is a man after my own heart.
He was from Iceland of course I didnt sleep with him, havent you seen Mighty Ducks 2???
every time i recognize a doctor or patient at the hospital on this rotation, i just pray it's not from my blackout saturday makeout slut moments...professionalism shouldn't count on weekends
She's good at three things and two of them involve dicks. And other one involves her love for arts
I swear if she asks me for a baby one more time I'm gonna sleep with one of her friends
Hey. I can't work your space dryer so I'm wearing your blanket home. I'll get my clothes later. Fun party!
In his defense he just bought a bong like a week ago so he's still in that honeymoon phase.
I don't think the best pickup line was. Hey I have never made a girl orgasm before but I'm sure it will work on someone like you.
I have a bruise on dick where you tried to "high five" me.
The bartender seems to not like the DD's anymore. I'm sad
Where'd you go last night?
Don't EVER let me photobomb a group of lesbians again. They made me their "straight mascot" and I ended up singing Donna summer tunes for beers at their apartment complex.
I traded him cumming in my face for a year for a Disney annual pass. One giant leap back for feminism, one small step for the adult child Disney fan.
Come eat Chinese buffet and watch us trip on acid. It'll be fun.
While walking to class I was handed a red bull, condoms, and a mini bible. I love my school.
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