I blew a .224 after sleeping for 6 hrs, cleary im a champion
HE had a tribal tattoo tramp stamp, jasmine.
I will give everyone a free pointer today. Here it goes, always pee by the house late at night to avoid getting shot by drunk bastards with guns. Never go by the tree line.
Only you could turn Mozart into a stripper song.
I thought he was joking about bailing you out until I saw the picture of you and the sheep in the morning paper. Were those my boots you had on it
we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
New scientific discovery: The hypothetical attractiveness of a woman increases exponentially as her skirt:boot ratio approaches zero. Nobel Prize in my future?
There's two girls at the bar sniffing each others boobs.
I just don't understand how we smoked the EXACT same thing and I feel fine but Tim's over here serenading his fifth bowl of fruit loops with Elton John's entire discography.
Will that be creepy to wake him up at midnight with my tongue all over his body??
i came so hard i kicked through my windshield
Hahah. They reconnected again?
Like with his penis I guess
I ACCIDENTALLY HOOKED UP WITH A GUY WHO HAS A NICHOLAS CAGE POSTER ABOVE HIS BED I CANT HANDLE LIFE.
The universe is either telling you 1. you make terrible decisions or 2. its time to let go of your hatred of Cage.
Dude, you stalking his LINKEDIN profile will NOT affect your chances with him. We aren't 40...
well my apartment and my life are still a disaster but I did clean off my desk so that's gotta count for something...
Randomize
