You know im sick of people that are still obsessed w obama. that was sooooo last year
just saw an advertisement for the rock in the tooth fairy...can you say rock bottom?
She soaked the fruit in vodka for ten minutes and then mixed it with normal fruit and sherbert icecream. It was called "lottery fruit".
look up what dreaming that you're in a lesbian relationship with a manatee means.
You broke a cabinet. You were climbing up it and it collapsed on you. Lines were crossed.
noooo, I woke up on his pack porch and the SUN WAS RISING. I saw red lights everywhere and heard sirens so I just ran for my life.
You can buy vodka at target here.. Maybe Missouri isn't so bad after all
Hangover or death. Death. I'll have a slice of death please.
bro your seconds weren't very sloppy last night, is everything ok?
We were all in the pool and he showed up with a pitcher of margarita. Everyone swam over to him. He poured it directly into our mouths like we were a Sea World act.
Dude my body has gone into shock from not eating frozen pizza and chips. I've been shitting like Richard Simmons after a night out of twerking in a corn field
She sent me a pic wearing only my batman cape. She stole my cape dude!
Needless to say, I woke up on the bathroom floor wearing the dress that my mom wore to the wedding. That open bar stole my soul.
I FOUND THE LEGS
I also tried to hide a bottle of vodka in a build a bear last night so that something that happened in my life
Randomize
