Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
We were tigers and tigers don't wear pants
some girl had on jean underwear. i hate america.
I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
Where'd you guys get the alcohol from?
Oh. Some homeless guy we picked up from I-70. He bought us $400 worth of alcohol in exchange for a shower.
...... wtf.
you cant just puke in an arbys and not order food. thatd be rude.
Ps, did you know if you google "drunk jenga", you're the first image that shows up?
I hooked up with a guy dressed as Wesley from the Princess Bride. I kept telling him what I wanted him to do and all he would say was "as you wish"
My New Years Resolution is to get everyone to start talking like a 40 year old douchebag. From now on, you will only refer to me as Chief.
Life isn't about who you kiss, drunk, at midnight. It's who you text nonsense to, sober, from the toilet.
I'm almost too hungover to function. Got into the wrong car by mistake. there was a rotweiler in it. Thank god he was more confused than i was for a minute.
All I've done this weekend is cum and drink. I think it's safe to say I'm dehydrated.
how come you came home with "Amanda owns this" written on your forhead
I finished OITNB and broke it off with my fuck buddy in the same day. It's going to be a rough week
While he was going down town Julie brown, I was eating French fries. True Love
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