He better hope I dont die soon. Because I would haunt his bitch ass and cock block 24/7
It was literally the size of a half eaten tic tac.
the black eye was caused by a 12 year old girl in a vampire costume who punched you in the face after you aggresively screamed "TEAM JACOB!" in her face & howled at the moon...
We welcome drunken adversity.
With open legs.
we started the countdown to drunken sledding this weekend.
Clearly it doesn't get better with age. Just more sexual
Seriously insulted!! You can not share my dick pick with your gay brother. He won't quit poking me on fb
Just put me in your contacts as coyote
AND I woke up to eggs in my bra. Thanks Taco Cabana...
I woke up this morning next to my computer with Google search results for "how to put out a fire."
I'm very scared to turn around.
New holiday tradition. Eat all the Xanax in the am, then wake up later after festivities and eat all the leftovers
It all started with a game of naked twister.
I think him and kristen are pretty serious now.. I dont think he cheats on her, anymore.
You yelled at me about a fork.
You probably deserved it, I'm very territorial about my cutlery.
Our faces when the strip club was closed looked like the grinch just stole Christmas ☹️
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