Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
I'm going to kill the bastard that switches my hot hookups from the previous night with ugly chicks
if you were to get worldwide popularity from playing guitar with a plastic yellow bat while drunk on YouTube, would you hate me?
i was focused on more important things... like standing, and not spilling my beer
He' s half Black and half Italian, I finally asked...this penis maybe one for the records.
Come over and play the Jeter 3000 drinking game. You drink if the commentators say "captain" or "3000". I'll drink if they say "overrated" or "past his prime".
I believe I convinced two girls to makeout for freedom last night Hahaha
It's christmas eve and my mom blacked out before me. If she beat me at that, what have I been learning at college?
There are rocks in my bed. And dirt all over my face. Explain?
And dildos are 35% off. So. Ya know. Savings.
So this tall girl jumped in our cab and I was like hey I have pics of u on my phone. It wasn't creepy at all
He laid on the ground 100 ft from the car crying about how he just wanted to be home already
I dont' remember leaving St. Cloud, getting home, or apparently directing traffic in the middle of the fucking street while black out drunk.
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
I can hear the pillow talk now, "how many condoms did you bring? Good, put them all on,"
Randomize
