um. i met him on myspace...we text now, he lives down the street
I thought we agreed I wasn't a screamer?
whoever threw up in my shampooo bottle is totally getting defriended on facebook.
i tried to stop you. you just kept saying your split ends needed punishment.
What hospital were we in last night? Insurance needs to know
Woke up this morning in a randoms bed clutching an airplane ticket. God I hope I'm still in the country
So he ended up throwing a watermelon that he stole from the cafeteria saying "if i cant have it no one can" of the 5th floor.
Someone got day drunk, but I'm not saying who.
It was me.
This is actually a pretty big deal for him. I mean, he contacted a stranger out of concern for someone else instead of for sex.
That does show growth.
Jesus, I just want to drink. Also simultaneously punch things and rub my vagina on them.
I need to start a penis folder so I stop "accidentally" showing people my junk. On a side note- St. Pattys penis was a hit, four leaf clover and all.
Asking me to suck on my nipples isn't going to make me less mad at you.
Just had a med school interview with that doctor I fucked in college. He remembered. Asked if I still have my nipple rings. Overall, I think it went well.
I need a hoe opinion
go on
I just ate part of my sock, this has got to stop.
You poured all their beer into ziploc baggies so it would be "better on the go"
Randomize
