Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
So now everyone thinks I don't know what a condom is
Another night of drunkeness. Maybe I shouldn't have played death pong...
Didn't you just get a DUI last week?
Indeed I did but death didn't stop Jesus now did it
is it sad that pink shorts and cowboy hats remind me of getting jizz in the hair?
i guess that's what happens when you find your girlfriend at the zoo
At best buy, little boy just crawled into my stall while i was taking a shit
he doesn't care that i have a boyfriend so why should i?
logic in its finest
We aren't going to mix hockey and sex texts tonight.
I totally agree. all sexting is on hold till after the games over.
Playoffs. This shit is serious.
can you go into shock from having too many orgasms? i think i went into shock.
We should try to put a bagel on your penis
Are you playing pokemon in the dark and sexting? I can't be mad at that.
honestly the most stressful part of moving is the chance my mom will find my vibrator
If I die tonight, you and your brother can split my money evenly for college only.
all $38?
Jesus fucking Mary Christ if I have to clean shit out of my fucking bathtub one more fucking time I'm gonna murder a fucking kitten
IDK if she's gay or not, but there is something about the way she looks at me that says "do dirty dirty things to me." I have no choice but to oblige.
Randomize
