Seeya bye Latvian government! Whammy!
Did you know that when you swallow it's like 60 calories!?
That's okay, it's all protein anyway.
OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
discovery: the myth about swedish girls giving good head? not a myth.
but really, i care about skinny girls as much as michael vick cares about rotweilers
he climbed up to our party on the 2nd floor balcony and then pulled a glass mug and a beer from his knapsack. these freshmen are intense
He looked me straight in the eye when he was fingering me last night...it was very serial killer.
I come back into the room and you're grinding with the person in the mascot suit.
Using a joint as a bookmark. What is my life?
I just wanted to let u know that I called the taco people and informed them what the fuck is up.
Go big or go home. Or get a live in house boy you met 7 years ago and feel like you have unfullfilled potential. You know, the usual
Like I would feel weird too if you just cancelled our wedding, cut off all your hair and started twerking everywhere
Do you remember ripping my condom off last night while yelling "I DEMAND MY MEAT RAW" like a Viking?
By the time we got to McDonald's you were sharing a Big Mac with a stripper.
Unexpected pro of the hostel though: literally down the street from Coors Field. I could literally fart on the building in five minutes.
Randomize
