so let's talk penis.
Do you know a sam ****, im at the bar right now and lookin for some dirt on her to guilt trip her in to sex
Now i know why people get high. I sat in the same chair for about 3 hours and the only thing i worried about was how far away my chinese food was.
I don't understand how anyone could look at him and think, 'Yeah, that's a good idea.'
I got kicked out of the bar but no one cared, I dont have any money so i stayed outside with the bouncer for an hour and he got so sick of me he let me back in on the condition that i cant leave my seat. VISIT ME
dude what did you give her she's eating her pocket lint
Thats stupid. Your future is a life of less pay for the same work. Free drinks is how capitalism reimburses women for its inequality. & youre not even taking it!
Operation: sleep in every bed at the boys' house is nearing completion. Now at 5/9. I AM GOLDILOCKS AND NO ONE CAN STOP ME
So, I'm tripsitting Ruben cause he's on LSD, and he's starting to eat the chair because 'it is evil' according to him... I can't choose: should I stop him or film it?
There. Isnt. A. Single. Person. Who. Is. Not. High. At. Church.
I don't want to just break his heart, I want to dip it in liquid nitrogen and then smash it until it's powder and snort the powder
someone stole my phone at the bar last night, naturally, it led to me waking up in the bartender’s bed
Until you've snorted cocaine at 6am before your nursing school clinicals birthing babies you're not on my level
He tried to eat me out...through my pants.
I never thought I'd be complaining about having sex 4 times a day, but here we are...
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