Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
Proposition. Sex. No words, no talking about it later. I just want you tonight.
Her brother is deaf.
no wonder she was so good with her hands
She gives me Chlamydia and somehow I'm still the asshole
You were like pukeahontas last night, you tried to tell us you were okay, then you puked in the garden.
She's a virgin AND a minister's daughter. We're one schoolgirl outfit from the dear penthouse trifecta
Apparently I tried to convince him to sleep with me by showing him that I could do dips....
I attempted to stand up and was quickly reminded by gravity that I am the universe's bitch right now
I'm mailing you cans of corn and that's final.
Marrying her is the worst scenario of any. That includes death and zombies.
U know this is gone far when im in the bathroom trying to take a pic of my asshole
Oh man I wish I could've gotten a picture of how many anti-circumcision stickers are on this Prius
last night i fell off a barstool and busted my nose. i can regretfully say that i didn't see cherub last night.
You're up at 3AM, right? I have a very important question.
You know the Wendy's on route 6, by Kohls? Do you know if it has a drive through?
Yes it does.
like sometimes I wish I was allergic to latex so I wouldn't have sex with so many people..
Randomize
