just took a sink shower in Arbys bathroom
Zach says you can't see his penis until after we're married...not sure why?! Bt then he said he thinks maybe you already have on the wild animal night!
dont worry about it. i always have emergency bong water with me
I'm going on a nature/throwup walk. Don't lock me out of the apartment.
I am in fact going to raffle myself off for a night. If you are interested in buying a ticket let me know. $10 a ticket.
Someone woke me up and gave me a sprite and some pills. I put them in my belly button. Trust no one.
I just found out my college boyfriend's nickname is actually a Dutch word for little cucumber.....it all makes sense now.
just had a very awkward conversation with the concierge at the hotel, they threw your underwear out
The bar tenders gave me the number for a "taxi"... It's just a dude with a van. In retrospect, pretty sketchy. Robert was cool though.
They're having lesbian sex while I play super mario world. I hope they like the music
does doing it on an automatic sink count as shower sex?
It's like you know you got fucjed up when you wake up and check fir your own pulse
My uterus feels like it went 8 rounds with Mike Tyson. And that was only a quickie.
You ask to touch his thighs ten times and called them magnificent.....need I say more
Jesus fuck. I just hit on him in front of the whole fire department. They hit the sirens and told us to get a room. FML. I can never go back to that fire station again...
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