Hahahhahaha! Oooh get it! Ugh I am so dead but if I go to the lib whuich I will hopefully b havung sex instead, ill hit u up
The guy asked if i had a problem w/set schedules
I just called a child with a Yankees jersey a jerkoff. so much for a friendly day @ the ballpark
She wanted to watch a Baby Einstein DVD while we fucked. I'm pretty open minded but that felt a little creepy.
just went trash diving in my work clothes for weed. A&E's intervention here i come.
A beer fell out of the case, hit the ground and started spraying. He's a pro. He grabbed it and shotgunned it while still holding the case.
The background of my phone is you taped to the wall wearing a cowboy hat
It's like the last supper of drinking before the summer ends
I don't mean to ruin your favorite Disney movie...but...we both came when Mufasa died.
I'll give you $10 to get a dick pic with a gecko on it.
Apparently I was proudly showing him the cup I barfed pizza rolls into
Apparently there's nothing on sonza for "giving a handjob while sunbathing"
Blocking me on Facebook doesn't change the fact that you've had my penis in my mouth. So there's that.
I found a video on my phone from last night... You got up on the table at McDonald's and screamed BURRITOOO!
Is that your mom climbing in your window dude
Randomize