Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
Now you know why i just sit on the toilet and scream
I caught a rooster roaming Edison Park then released it in the bar. They made me try to catch it again and somebody played the chicken dance while I chased it
No, dude. Even Jesus hates Creed.
drunk pissing on my closed toilet lid is actually quite a sobering experience
im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
Dude...disintegrating condoms. Think about it. For all the guys that wanna go raw dog but their girls won't let them, and for the girls that wanna get pregnant but their guys don't want a kid. What do you think?
I think you've been hitting the soco too hard again.
She gave me a rubber ducky to make me feel better while I was throwing up.
went from writing my paper to watching obamas speech to crushing beers and singing springsteen in a crowd of 100 within 20 minutes. I love this country
I'm at the hospital waiting for my sister to push out her kid. I think I'll roam the halls and shame all the teenage mothers.
I had to run home with my hands covering my tits this morning. How does this keep happening?
yea I went to the store high again.. I think we're having pie for dinner.
There are no winners in a lube eating competition.
I'm glad I didn't see Grandma stumbling drunk and peeing herself...it would be like seeing my future.
Randomize
