Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
anyone who has a picture of a ferrari with the caption "mAh DreAM caR" is getting denied as my facebook friend.
you probably should not have drank the wine that everyone spits out. and the sad part, that was not even your low point last night
Just spent the last of my lifesavings on (what i hope is enough of) alcohol. Hello summer.
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
i cant answer while inside this church craft show. so unless you're outside with my engagement ring and a nonfat gingerbread latte, it'll have to wait.
No, i will not have sex with him again. It felt like he was trying to bulldoze his way through me. My vagina is on strike.
He was the only guy who ever made me cry..
Who, the park ranger who made you dump out your beer on the beach?
He said you stopped mid-fuck, called fives on his dick, walked out to grab another drink, and came back.
Kriste-san. Brian-sensai going to sleepy times acturry. Kriste-grasshopper will spend fun-fun times with Brian-sensai and glorious redbox movie tomorrow yes?
Most creative movie date proposition... ever.
Come get your sister, she's waving a shoe about and threatened to "teabag the Shit" out of the doorman because she can't check the shoe in.
how should I feel if a guy kept complimenting my bangs while I was giving him a blowjob?
Everybody posting sickening holiday couple pics and I'm over here deepthroating a bottle of whiskey.
After the day I've had, I can't decide if donuts or fireball would be the appropriate priority.
I would cock slap so many things if I had a cock.
Randomize
