Did you read the article making fun of the right wing extremists? How they organized this 'tea party', and to propagate it they would mail teabags to their senators? And it became a verb...they had posters saying 'teabag obama!' yeah...
A message to Mrs Obama perhaps?
I wish you had a penis so you could experience peeing out the window in front of a crowd of people leaving parties.
i feel like my life is a cheap remake of American Pie
that's the last time we turn jepordy into a drinking game.
Tonight will be judged a success if I walk out without having thrown up on my shirt.
I think for all the guys in my phone, I'm going to change their pictures to pics of their dicks. It's easier to identify them that way.
college stoner meal of the day: microwaved nutrigrain bars
Wow i don't think I've had to send this many texts apologizing for my behavior since high school...
Will you bring a case of beer down to the hot tub? Me and Phil don't want to feel feelings anymore
day drinking caused me to be in bed at a decent time. can't complain.
6 more days and it'll be a year since i slept with him and never went home
Honestly my life is shambles over a married man who looked like a fuckin NERD ON HIS WEDDING DAY
my gynecologist gave me a high 5 for not getting any STD's since my last visit and said "Way to go Annabeth!" you have twenty seconds to get to my level
I realized my soar muscles form the shape of me leaning over a toilet
I woke up in a warehouse with the words “Property of Adam” written on my chest in frosting.
Randomize
