i'm going to be one of those im-wearing-a-shirt-as-a-dress girls today. dont make fun of me, i need laid
Just got my econometrics book in the mail and started flipping through it. Our Thursday parties may turn into u convincing me not to kill myself.
if pee wee herman would have taken a snuggie to the movies he wouldnt have gotten caught
He must be back home now. He moved his box of beer from her porch to ours.
Just walked in on my older brother getting a bj. He told the girl to "keep going" and then attempted to high five me
He couldn't stand on his own, but he managed to somehow to get to the beer garden and get served 3 more. I'm proud to call him my cousin.
Ya, because touching his brother's face for 20 minutes in front of him wasn't bad enough, I also threw up in his garden and stole like 10 of his shirts before I left. But I fed his dog, so it's okay.
I may or may not go. send a pic of a nipple so I know how much fun you're having
I renamed his cat Jeff last night. Well I spray painted it on him.
Mom and I shoplifted today. Her idea.
Retirement sounds fun.
There's no such thing as shame in your world, is there?
There is a special place in hell for people who only eat the center of the pot brownies.
I wore Yonce braids out last night and made out with a man and a woman #bowdown is right
I think everyone at the office can tell I'm dehydrated
you mean still drunk
I've heard it both ways
We free pour in this house. Measuring alcohol is for the weak
Randomize
