Be sure to let me know if your relationship crumbles so I can resume hitting on you
Someone's got a whale tail
A thong is hangin out?
No, a fatty following them
this girl and her friend just showed up at my house. standing together, theylook exactly like the number 10. this has cockblock written alllllll over it.
i think i'd rather have a trophy of a like jizz stained curtain or something
so there is either a lot of blood or a lot of wine in the shower....
nothing says roomie bonding better than a sunday shroom trip.
Boy did I ever crash and burn on the pickled egg pick up line.
He let him chew on his fu man chew. The man has the patience of a saint
My head is pounding and I need an ice pack for my vag. Successful friendsgiving!
I'm glad the semester is over. I need a break from the term "whiskey sharts" coming up so much in conversation.
I THINK it was the lead singer. Whoever he was, I have his number and his dick was pierced.
It was totally the lead singer.
She showed me her tits outside Taco Bell....After she flashed the dude working there in an effort to get in.
You were so drunk you told some dude your life story in one short sentence... and kissed his fiancé. You're invited to the wedding.
The boob job was worth every penny just to see the expression of pure joy on his face the first time he saw them.
I don't get a "my roommate is fucking you" discount?!
Randomize
