If burritos were dicks, we'd have a serious relationship problem on our hands. Just saying.
Theres also beggin' strips and a dog bone in the corner...nooo signs of there being a dog though.
She answered the door wearing a blanket and holding a golf club. I was too late for this party.
She made a roadhead CD. Can I marry her?
Weirdest sensation ever: having your penis fall asleep. It was like tiny hulk hogan was choking it out
We were pulling the glow sticks off of him and he just kept yelling, "my bones! You're taking my bones!" and asking me if I was on the crew team
Oh please not the Easy Cheese again. That was weird.
I am coping with the snow storm with beer and shots of jack. If I were outside in shorts I might be able to pass as a Canadian.
I drank, I fought, I made my ancestors proud.
And then someone hit me with a pool cue
My only regret this past weekend is abusing only 3 substances when I could have done so much more.
There are no winners in a lube eating competition.
I promise that I won't shotgun beers with your boyfriend this time, Scouts Honor.
Nice. I got home at like 3am.stopped at Walmart for a vacuum and weirdly a trash can. Not sure why high me last night needed a new trashcan.
I just peed on myself the semester has officially began.
i solemnly vow to never stick my penis into crazy again
I give it a week.
Randomize
