Just mADE A PArabola og urine
no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
Just boiled hotdogs in bongwater. NOT a good idea.
Why did you video tape me drying my boxers in the microwave?
mom asked me why i'm never sober at family events, i told her i learned it from her.
No you can't have a vodka redbull. The pilgrims didn't have vodka redbull.
shes trying to book us all flights to Ireland..I let her get mine and yours but stopped her when she tried booking the guy next to her at the library
It's a gateway drink.... Starts with wine... Then I wake up in my car with mascara on my arms covered in french fries...
He asked if I smoke and I said "only fools like you on the basketball court!" Then I started crying. I think I'm about to have my period.
This whole bra on the outside of my shirt thing is so convenient. It turns my shirt into a pocket to eat Fritos out of. Mmm boobies
gorilla chasing a banana on crotch rockets. Halloween is getting way too real
I made friends with the delivery guy because he had beautiful dread locks and was a Zelda fan. He texted me after he left saying he wasn't trying to be creepy but we should be friends. We're hanging out tomorrow.
How does this kind of shit happen to you?!
I just realized I haven't got laid since the last time the Browns won.
He sent me a pic stitch collage of all the tit pics I had sexted him this month. It was so sweet!
A picture of a damn cupcake brought back 3 fuckboys
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