I haven't seen him in over a year. He asked me to his prom over myspace. Is he fucking serious?
i just google searched 'can you pop your ovary'
So baked. Thought the twigs on the sidewalk were caterpillars with the ability to harden in self defense. Had to pick one up to be sure.
Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
If you win this game of words with friends, ill suck you off for 30 minutes. No lie.
I cant last that long. Do i get the rollover minutes?
he was terrible at kissing, so i just kept letting him motorboat me. he seemed very pleased with my choice
I now have an ENTIRE drawer of unused disposable silverware from Boston Market... and you guys said I needed to "buy" kitchen stuff
Apparently this is my life now. Fucking men in their 30s with small dogs.
Not much, just taking another sorting hat quiz while waiting for this porno to finish buffering
I woke up wearing my panties and an eyelash, soo I'd say your birthday was a success.
I think one of my ovaries is committing suicide. But that is a topic for another day.
Dude I bought tampons with cardboard applicators by accident and now I know my vagina hates the 1960s
I just told my bowl "sorry" for putting it down, because I thought I hurt its feelings. omg. I'm high.
I consider walking to the bars and dancing my exercise and I buy doubles so my drinks r heavier so that's my arm workout
"They won't do it. I'm in the middle of darkness. " and "Probably going to die. I've been walking for 50 minutes in one direction" are the last texts I got from Steve
Randomize