Full bush! Can't stay! Need ride! Come on bro!
I really wish I could go back in time to change the course of events that led to me sitting on the internet at 3 Googling 'Traumatic masturbation' while talking to you about failed dates, and running a virtual restaurant in a video game.
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
& he told me 'I don't think ur a big slut-just kind of an average slut'
HE THINKS THATS A COMPLIMENT!!!!!
I had to download the flashlight app so I could finish taking a dump when the power went out.
Whenever I walk away from the group without saying anything, NEVER assume I'm just going to the bathroom.
She asked if I wanted to "Mormon Motorboat" her, which I guess is just motor-boating her through her cloths. Turns out I did.
She's posted my bail. Twice. Of course I'm going to be her wing girl.
WTF DUDE?
Stay calm. I'm sure there's a heterosexual explanation for this
I ended up at home with a random bird sculpture and flowers
You literally spelled every word wrong or with numbers except for "drunk", which you used all caps for.
I felt the need to accentuate it....
Woke up and took my pants off only to realize that I was wearing my shirt from last night as my underwear
i had every intention of working out now im just drinking wine and thinking about taking nudes in my thigh high tube socks
I'm always down for nudity.
I woke up using a beer can as a pillow. successful party?
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