Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
TLC. RIGHT NOW. PRIMORDIAL TODDLERS.
im flying all the way to minnesota to see him for four days... cutest-best-friend-reunion or most-epic-booty-call-ever?
who says it cant be both...
A very small part of me wants you to appreciate me for more than just my breasts. But the rest of me is breasts.
just to let ya know we might have to take a stripper snowboardin sometime
I don't like finding out that my fuck buddy is a good person.
Just caught my dad doing coke in my bathroom again. Guess whose getting a new car for christmasss.
It feels kinda weird thanking you for sucking my dick, but I just don't know what else to do right now
The teenager outdrank all of us. All. Of. Us. I woke up and she was getting everyone water and fruit snacks. I give up.
Hey, scratch that. I've shit 8 times today. I don't have the energy to get laid so I cancelled my date.
If Plan B had a rewards card I would have earned so many free tote bags by now
You told him he looked like Jesus and that you wanted to fuck his face, I'd say your blind date went well
He said he loved me more than Kel loves orange soda
the result of growing up in the '90's
i think i left you like a 5 minute message about the mcchicken burger i was eating. I think I called wanting sex but the mcchicken burger was a lot more seducing.
Can I borrow a thong? I’m having drinks with a cute boy tonight and I’m out of clean underwear
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