I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
Non-Jews are for practice
I can't get out of the parking garage so now I'm staying downtown....Typical
I was getting a bj with sports center on in the background
Da na na, na na naa
You're the host. Of course you wear the diaper. It's like wearing the pants.
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
He texted me for drugs this time. Not sex. I dunno if I should be pleased it's not sex or disappointed that I come across as a druggie
I'm standing outside of the bar watching homeless men teach a kid how to pee of the sidewalk.
i just remembered that i did the "single ladies" dance ON THE BAR...fuck you slippery nipples i curse the day i discovered you
I HAVE A BLACK EYE FROM A DILDO!! IM GETTING MARRIED TOMORROW! THIS IS NOT A MISSUNDERSTANDING!
Dude. Once again. Cleaning house. Found weed I hid from myself a month ago. Celebrating/testing it out. if i dont text back in 10, call dominos.
I know. I feel like I should be doing mature responsible adult things though. Like getting loans, working 60 hours every week and not eating burritos in bed, ya know?
so the casino kicked my ass last night, i'm pretty sure i hit a new level of hungover....just showered with my sunglasses on because the bathroom light is too bright
Just had an emotional break through with the dog. That high.
Can I send you a random dick pic? It's got a lightsaber tattoo
Randomize
