theres bread in your mailbox im going to eat it
nevermind its newpaper
I was so drunk last night I wanted to download a Busta Rhymes album.
there is a school bus full of santas parked in front of the liquor store
I know it may not be fiscally responsible to pregame fifty cent night, but I'm gonna go ahead and do it anyway.
I feel the need to clarify that I did not show her my vagina.
Thanks for pulling me out of the bed by my feet atleast one of us was sober enough to know I had work at 5 am.
I was dressed in monkey onesie serving people vodka jelly with a spoon...
BRING ME THE PLAN B. ILL GIVE YOU A FREE WATER BOTTLE AND A BUMPER STICKER AND SOME BACON BITS
No. I just want to cuddle and talk about our feeling. Of course this a booty call.
It's always a good night until the penis tattoo makes an appearance
Well at least ssomeone is or the state is tafing over ir in twligiob
It's has to do with my genitals. Don't ask.
Where am I? And why the fuck did you leave me here?
Relax. I left you somewhere safe plus you have all my weed so you know I will come back for you.
There's a fuckload of syrup all over the floor.
It's all fun and games until your mom recognizes your bootycall from 2018 as her attorney
Randomize
