Houston.. we have a drinking problem..
Hashbrowns don't come out your nose as easily as you would think
He puts stickers to promote his new shirt company in every sack he sells. He's like the donald trump of weed
Last night you were talking while puking saying, "ahh the shoes and the purse, I'm gonna have to wash those"
I woke up because a stranger was shoving an already lit bowl into my mouth. Spring break is awesome
I flashed a party boat full of Asians yesterday, didn't I?
Woke up covered in green glitter and beer. I am never leaving Ireland.
I like to get drunk just like anyone else but not to the point of sticking a rubber tube up my asshole
Oh fuck. There is like a human shit on the sidewalk. I hate this place.
That is an awkward looking cockshot, not gonna lie
The rest of the concert I just stared at the lights and didn't really listen to the music cuz I was trying to make sure my brain still worked cuz my face was numb and I couldn't move... Yeah I'm not a weed brownie person
'go have sex with her' ddoes not count as wingman
People don't tend to fuck with you when they think you have someone else's blood on your face
struggle bus is officially taking me on a road trip to hell. If this is just the first destination, I'll jump out the fucking window.
If you enjoy dance recitals as much as I do, that's one shitty Father's Day...
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