I bet he comes in French.
should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
I think I might.. possibly.. like a Justin Bieber song.
I think you might... possibly... have sprouted a vagina.
She said I wasn't helping her abandonment issues by not responding to her texts at 4 am
Look I know it's late and I hope this doesn't wake you up but I feel like you should know that I'm sleeping on my couch in my own apartment so that my friend can get laid in my bed, and I would do the same for you.
That's the first time I've ever heard something that tickled both my gag reflex and my penis simultaneously.
Topless bubble bath with a lesbian is debatable as a gay experience.
If me getting shot doesn't get me pussy I am officially gay
I'm slightly more gay than I thought. I'd go so far as to say I'm a top.
Welp, I can cross "making out with a guy in a dress" off my bucket list...
I'm disgusted with myself. I feel like I need 10 boxes of Summer's Eve and a baptism.
I'm gonna have to shit in a bar again tonight
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
My liver is screaming fuck you right now.
I'm like a sensual ninja. You turn your head for a second and.... BOOM I'm naked. It's like a naughty magic trick.
Randomize
