You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
Can't remember why I called but it definitely had something to do with Lou Bega
i told him i was sober and he walked away immediately.
Apparently I climbed into a dryer last night and refused to leave... There are pictures to prove it
Oh, and for future reference, telling a guy that your ass is too tight for anal is like painting a bullseye on it.
You bring the bicep workout. I'll bring the unscented gentle products. We'll both bring our penises.
These pubs in Ireland act like hand jobs aren't the universal currency
Srsly this has gone to far. Just broke my nose on the toilet. College bars.
hey i found one of your nipple clamps under my couch, i miss you!
I'll be honest with you, my dick was out at that point in time.
I scrubbed the bathroom, smoked a bowl, and gave myself 3 orgasms. If the world ends today, I feel accomplished.
WHITE RUSSIAN WEDNESDAY. TELL YOUR CO WORKERS. INVITE QND PREPARE
My dad found my bra hanging from my rear view mirror. Happy long weekend.
if having to see my ex’s dick once in a while is the price I pay to the universe for making my life go a little smoother, I’ll take it
the funny thing was, all i remember was a liter of vodka and going to oneonta for the night. then 2 weeks later bam, i get a letter banning me from campus for the next 4 years. awesome convorsation with my dad to wake up to.
Randomize
