The duggars are the reason premarital sex is ok. Because if you don't have it until marriage you have no self control when it happens. And 19 kids.
why the fuck does my google maps say i'm in punjab?!?!? u think it has to do with like...outsourcing?
that knocking you heard last night......that was her head slowly going through the wall
Now accepting hypotheses about how i managed to get a bruise between my boobs....
He started doing the gator chop at my vag and said he couldn't wait to "chomp" on it later...and I still slept with him. I hate gainesville.
you want a dog just so you can strap a barrel of hot chocolate around its neck?
He always finds the good stuff. He's like a truffle pig for bud.
She flashed them and they let her pay with Monopoly money. I'm married, so it is your obligation as my best man to repeatedly fuck her for me
Actually, I take that back. You can only have it if I'm allowed to French braid the mullet.
He saved you from those guys at the club, took you home, and made you breakfast. If this isn't your come to Jesus moment IDK what is.
Just spilled a coffee mug full of scolding hot oatmeal on my bare dick. Hope you're having a good Friday night too.
I say this out of love and friendship. Eat ice cream not the d.
I'm at 45 minutes post orgasm, and I still feel my insides spasming. Pretty sure I just fucked Superman.
Wanna get drunk and play candy land? If so you are 2 steps behind.
I'm about 40% drunk. You know, not drunk enough to light the bar on fire, but drunk enough to let the cougar hit on me.
Randomize
