Did I ever tell you that the first person i made out with cried?
people are starting to question the shark bite story
I thought I hit my peak drinking in college. Just finished first day on Wall Street. College was nothing.
Fuck now we have to have sex
What?
In a bet, need to win
He gave me such a powerful orgasm I blurted out I love you. This is why just rebouding out of a serouis relationship is awkward.
What's a good pandora station to masturbate to?
nothing like walking in the house at 3 am in my panties and a sheer shirt carrying a life sized cardboard dale earnhardt jr
Mother fucker, I knew it was bad when you tried making out with my car window
Yeah. Got a major ego boost when she said she felt like she had just fucked King Arthur. Buying some donuts later to celebrate with, wanna join?
you went to ralph's and bought all of their pears and left them outside my house
Meh, all I have to do tomorrow is proctor an AP test. No loud noises and no physical activity allowed for almost 4 hours. Sounds like the perfect recovery period for a hangover.
When you accidentally text the wrong guy for a dick pic and your surprised you get one In return. He just got on my "to do" list
Good luck. While you're suffocating on a dick, I'll be eating pizza rolls. Being a good girl.
fucking him is like fucking old faithful. you could set your watch by his orgasms.
I really need to stop having sex.. I haven't been able to get a brush through the back of my hair for a good week and a half
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