There is now a Twilight themed dildo. What do YOU want for christmas??
that knocking you heard last night......that was her head slowly going through the wall
Judging by what she did last night, I would say at least 4 of them have mono now.
If he can forgive your lousy blowjobs, you can ignore his terrible driving.
She legitimately thought I was hiding in the fridge, then she checked the second one to be sure
That night just went downhill after you pissed yourself while sitting on my lap
Life is so difficult sometimes. Can you imagine? Going through life, constantly creating boners everywhere you go.
I also made him write a nonfiction romance novel about what happened and to give it to me when the time was right
I am seriously only coming over if there are McNuggets. I want 10 bitch. Honey mustard.
I'm finally in my bed, my pants are off, and there's no pee on my carpet this is the best life has been all day
Went out with the family last night and some 40 yr old lady wanted to take me home. My mom was not happy with me
If I were better looking, this would be the point where I'd resign myself to stripping.
So I crawled off the trampoline to puke in the neighbors yard. Wonderful house guest right here
Like he was cock blocking and it usually takes ten cocks to block this cock
Sitting naked, eating lucky charms with rain boots on
Randomize
